I thought that this was over, but I guess it's not. Grunge is ten years gone, and with it, blessedly, flannel shirts on fashionable people and "vintage" clothing that should be left to winos, but Stink is back, and it's back full force.
I should explain something here. I am a non-stinky person. I think I'm filthy if I take only one shower a day. I use lots of soap, and deodorant, and a modest amount of perfume. When I take my hair down from its bun, people around me are knocked over, not by the smell of scalp, ew, but by a wave of shampoo smell. I wash my clothes after wearing them. I brush my teeth after eating. You get the picture: I am clean.
I am apparently the last person on earth of this kind.
Last night, I went out to a show. I felt very proud of myself, because in addition to being just as clean as your Gramma, I'm also just as fond of my rest, and the show didn't start until 10:30. A pal of mine was spinning. She was excellent, as always. Halfway through her set, a guy sidled over to me. He had a vaguely pubic-looking mustache, shifty eyes and an overpowering aroma that I couldn't quite place at first.
"I'm Clark*," He said, holding out his hand. "Okay," I said."Are you a friend of ___?" He pointed to the tables. I realized two things right then: That he was a friend of my friend, a fellow dj, and not, therefore, necessarily trying to pick me up, and that he smelled exactly like the backside of balls on a hot day.
"Oh!" I said, super-friendly now that I'd made these embarrassing realizations. "Yes! I am! I'm Jen!" (I always talk like this! I'm super cheerful! You smell like balls!)
Clark looked at me strangely. "Well," he said. "I saw you talking to her, and I figured, you know, that you were friends."
"We are! She's great!" You smell like balls. "I love her! I love her music!"
"Um. Okay. So." He skittered off, bringing his cloud of stench with him. I stood there against the post I had been leaning against, trying to figure out if I was: a) a snob, for being terrified of body odor, b) a loser, for being blown off by a stinky person, or c) totally and completely insane with the mindfucking, all day long.
I'm voting for C, personally.
*Names altered just slightly to protect the unwashed and their affiliates
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Hey Jennie, I know exactly how you feel. It doesnt seem as important to alot of people anymore. Just today I had a bit of an argument with my fiancee's father who lives with us. I think i'd have a better chance at getting my cat to take a shower than him. they both react to water the same way. LOL. thank God his son isn't like him...i wouldn't be with him if he was. I agree with you 100%, Stinky people are embarrasing.
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