Jennie Smash: Do you know what actually happened to that face transplant woman?
Ma Smash: She got a face transplant?
Jennie Smash: No, before that.
Ma Smash: No! What?
Jennie Smash: She tried to kill herself by taking an overdose of sleeping pills. And then her dog thought she was dead, so he tried to eat her face.
Ma Smash: No! Ew! Really?
Jennie Smash: Really, really. Dogs are predators, you know. Doesn't matter how much they love you. If you're dead, you're lunch. And they start with your face, it seems. I guess it's chewy, or something.
Ma Smash: Maybe he was just trying to wake her up, and he got carried away.
Jennie Smash: He ate her nose, lips, and chin.
Ma Smash: Oh, dear. Well, I guess it's true then. You can't believe anything you see on TV.
Jennie Smash: ?
Ma Smash: All this time, I thought Lassie was trying to tell Timmy's folks that he was in the well. Now it seems like maybe she was just waiting for him to float to the top.
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im gonna go 'glass half-full' here and pretend the dog was just really really enthsistically trying to wake her up.
ReplyDeleteWow. And I just got a dog. Luckily, at least, Luke's teeth aren't exposed enough yet to be able to eat a face. Still, after that story, I'm glad he sleeps in a crate at night.
ReplyDeleteYou just think he sleeps in a crate at night.
ReplyDeleteRemember that ugly guy in the basement in Goonies? The Fratelli's slept good, too.